Paper Cuts!

I'm sitting here at work...on my break of course...and people watching. I see hostile tension between co-workers, the comadarie between others...then I see "them"...the couple that thinks that no one in the office knows are a couple...yiiiiyah..rrrright...no one can see the eye glances, or the slight touch of the shoulder, or how when you laugh; you feel the need to touch him with each giggle...you're right...no one notices because you hide it soo well.



My readers, this brings me to an interesting topic; have you ever worked somewhere and started up an office romance? Well I have been down this road...some ended amicably and well...others... not so kindly.



First, you have your interview...when asked, "Would you like a tour of the office?" You first instinct is, "Hell ya, i wanna see what type of people work here! Are the girls fashionable? Are the guys good looking? How about my boss?" Without realizing it, in the back of your mind, you're wondering if you'll be hookin up with any one; BEFORE you're even offered the job. But of course, you smile nicely and say, "Yes, a tour would be nice of, what would hopefully be my new work environement" you chuckle, the HR director chuckles and proceeds with the tour. She takes you through the orientation suite, then the break room, you stop at the IT office...you check it out, look around, but no one is there..then tour around the floor, look into the offices; see some good looking people. Lastly, to make it back to the receptionist area, thank the HR Director for their time and go home and cross your fingers for THEEE Phone call.


Well, congratulations, you got the job! Your first day is Monday and it so happens to be that there is a company meeting that day. Nice...you'll be able to scope everyone out and see if there are any potential datable people. You make eye contact with one good looking fella'; he smiles, you smile and then, without thinking...you wink at him, he gives you a coy smile while he blushes. Then, wouldn't luck have it, you're on the same team; you'll be working side by side with this cute guy.


Meeting is adjourned and off to the desk, that will be your new "home" for 40 hours a week. You meet your new collegue, you extend your hand and with poise introduce yourself, " Hi I'm Pandora". He smiles, you can see he likes your confidance, turns over to you and shakes your hand and says "Hi, I'm Adam".

Mmm Adam, you check him out from head to toe, dark hair, dark eyes, built like an adonis...oh..to see this man, you would think the Statue of David was a replica of THIS man...oh yummy..he's well dressed in a nice pinstripe suit, pale blue shirt, no tie....you make your way down to his feet and see that he's finished off the beautiful suit with wingtip shoes and while scoping out his shoes; you begin to pray to the fashion gods, that he's wearing...BINGO!! Black socks! To me it is such a turn off when a man wears white socks with EVERYTHING!!!

His handshake is firm, it says he isn't afraid to treat you like an equal not like a dainty flower with a whimpy handshake. I personally cant stand those type of handshakes...i like to be taken seriously...a strong, firm handshake says it "...I'M HERE FOR BUSINESS!!"

So, Adam begins to train you, shows you all that needs to be done so the team is successful. You catch on the his flirtatious attitude and just like an archer looking for a bullseye, you find your mark, only you're the arrow and he's the bullseye.

You begin to learn the business and go to him for everything, even for the most tideous things; just to be near his "aroma". Your heart starts to skip a beat when he comes near your desk, you think he's coming to talk to you, only to see that he has to pass your desk to get to the community fax. Oh, Adonis Adam...notice me, because you will be mine.

He starts to ask you out to lunch, you play coy and decline the first two times he asks, saying you had prior plans but "maybe next time". "Keep him interested" you tell yourself, "you dont want to play too hard to get". So, when next time happens to come around, you decide to invite him for lunch. Unlike you, he gladly accepts, you go out to lunch and people from the office start to notice that you two are becoming "friendly". Then the stares, whispering and snickering begin. You tell yourself, "who cares nothing is happening; even if there was, its none of their business"

He starts to slack off at work,but you dont care, because look at him...he is FINE!!! You decide to cover for him. When upper management assigns a report to be completed by the end of the week, just like a school girl meeting up with her high school crush, you get all giddy because you'll be working late nights with him. You work 12 hour days to get the report completed, Adonis Adam hadn't worked one hour of overtime...as soon as quitting time strikes, he hits the door without so much as offering to help complete the report.

You thought the late nights would spark up the romance between you two, but all you have to show for those late nights are not the sensual glow of a woman being with her adonis, but rather countless papercuts from trying to get the report completed by the deadline.

Since there wasnt much for him to do and you decide to get bold...you ask him if he'd like to go out for drinks. You know it was a rough week (mainly for you since you did all the work) and figured this is exactly what you needed to get the edge off. He accepts and says, "I know just the right spot"...you take that as an enuendo and reply, "First, you'll need to buy me a drink before you try to find the right spot" and then wink at him. A smile comes across his face...HOOKED! "I got him interested" you think to yourself.

The night is definitely eventful. What started out as a couple of drinks, turned into tequila shots being thrownback left and right. Your confident because you can handle your liquor which has him more intrigued with you. Then he goes for it...steals a kiss. But is really stealing when you know you would have been very willing to give it to him? One thing leads to another and you wake up in a hotel room. Passed out beside you is Adonis Adam, he's sound alseep, you slowly run your fingers down his body..thinking out of all the men in the office to date, you got THIS man. Then...something overcomes you and you have the urge to look through his wallet. Call it intuition or maybe plan ass noseyness, but you know it'll eat at you if you dont. You slide out of bed trying not to wake him and reach for his pants to get his wallet and notice that his phone is vibrating. You pick it up to see the caller ID and across the screen says, "WIFEY"...WHAT!!??? Frantically you pull out the wallet and as you flip the wallet open, you hope it will only be his driver's license...no...its a wedding picture of him and his "WIFEY". You grab the phone and throw it at his head and wake him..." What the hell!!!" He screams. You respond in a calm voice,"Oh, my bad...I thought maybe you'd want to answer the phone call from your WIFE!!!!" you shout.

You grab your clothes and run to the bathroom and begin to cry...as the tear falls from your eye, down your cheek it strikes right down on one of your papercuts; stinging it. You grab your finger and squeeze it to stop the stinging. All you can think about was: What was work going to be like on Monday!

So, my readers...please think twice before starting off an office romance, because if not careful, you just might end up with a papercut!