Monday, August 24, 2009

Someone was able to capture my first 40 years in...."A Time Comes"

This was forwarded to me and it was an amzing read; kudos to the unknown autther. This sums up exactly whay I felt when I woke up to my 40th birthday. Hope you all enjoy it as much as i did. All i can say is..."GWOW!!!"


A Time Comes

A time comes in your life when you finally get it. When in the midst of all your fears and insanity you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out ? ENOUGH! Enough fighting and crying or struggling to hold on. And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum, your sobs begin to subside, you shudder once or twice, you blink back your tears and through a mantle of wet lashes and you begin to look at the world through new eyes.

This is your awakening.

You realize that it's time to stop hoping and waiting for something to change, or for happiness, safety and security to come galloping over the next horizon. You come to terms with the fact that in the real world there aren't always fairy tale endings (or beginnings for that matter) and that any guarantee of "happily ever after" must begin with you, and in the process a sense of serenity is born of acceptance.

You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect, and that not everyone will always love, appreciate or approve of who or what you are and that's OK. (They are entitled to their own views and opinions.) And you learn the importance of loving and championing yourself, and in the process a sense of newly found confidence is born of self-approval.

You stop complaining and blaming other people for the things they did to you (or didn't do for you) and you learn that the only thing you can really count on is the unexpected. You learn that people don't always say what they mean or mean what they say, and that not everyone will always be there for you, and that it's not always about you.

So, you learn to stand on your own and to take care of yourself and in the process a sense of safety & security is born of self-reliance. You realize that much of the way you view yourself, and the world around you, is a result of all the messages and opinions that have been ingrained into your psyche.

And you begin to sift through all the crap you've been fed about how you should behave, how you should look, how much you should weigh, what you should wear, where you should shop, what you should drive, how and where you should live, what you should do for a living, who you should sleep with, who you should marry, what you should expect of a marriage or what you owe your parents. You learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view.

And you begin reassessing and redefining who you are and what you really stand for. You learn the difference between wanting and needing, and you begin to discard the doctrines and values you've outgrown, or should never have bought into to begin with, and in the process you learn to respect your instincts.

You learn that it is truly in giving that we receive. And that there is power and glory in creating and contributing, and you stop maneuvering through life merely as a "consumer" looking for your next fix.

You learn that you don't know everything, it's not your job to save the world, and that you can't teach a pig to sing. You learn to distinguish between guilt and responsibility, and the importance of setting boundaries and learning to say NO. You learn that the only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry, and that martyrs get burned at the stake.

Then you learn about love; romantic love and familial love. You learn that you will not be more beautiful, more intelligent, more lovable, or important because of the man or woman on your arm or the child that bears your name. You stop trying to control people, situations, and outcomes. You learn that just as people grow and change, so it is with love and you learn that love is a verb, it is action. And you look in the mirror and come to terms with the fact that you will never be a size 5 or a perfect 10 and you stop trying to compete with the image inside your head and agonizing over how you "stack up." You come to the realization that you deserve to be treated with love, kindness, sensitivity, and respect, and you will not settle for less.

And you allow only the hands of a lover who cherishes you, to glorify you with his or her touch and in the process you internalize the meaning of self-respect. And you learn that your body really is your temple. You learn that fatigue diminishes the spirit and can create doubt and fear, so you take more time to rest.

And, just as food fuels the body, laughter fuels the soul, so you take more time to laugh and to play. You learn that, for the most part, in life you get what you believe you deserve and that much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophecy.

You learn that anything worth achieving is worth working for, and that wishing for something to happen is different from working toward making it happen. More importantly, you learn that in order to achieve success, you need direction, discipline, and perseverance. You also learn that no one can do it all alone and that it's OK to risk asking for help.

You learn that the only thing you must truly fear is the great robber baron of all time: FEAR itself. You learn to step right into and through your fears, because you know that whatever happens you can handle it, and to give in to fear is to give away the right to live life on your terms. And you learn to fight for your life and not to squander it living under a cloud of impending doom. You learn that life isn't always fair, you don't always get what you think you deserve, and that sometimes bad things happen to unsuspecting, good people.

On these occasions you learn not to personalize things. You learn that God isn't punishing you or failing to answer your prayers. It's just life happening. And you learn to deal with evil in its most primal state -- the ego. You learn that feelings such as anger, envy, and resentment must be understood and redirected, or they will suffocate the life out of you and poison the universe that surrounds you.

You learn to admit when you are wrong and to build bridges instead of walls. You learn to be thankful and to take comfort in many of the simple things we take for granted, things that millions of people upon the earth can only dream about; a full refrigerator, clean running water, a soft warm bed, a long hot shower. Slowly, you begin to take responsibility for yourself by yourself, and you try to make yourself a promise--to never betray yourself. And you hang a wind chime outside your window so you can listen to the wind. And you make it a point to keep smiling, keep trusting, and to stay open to every wonderful possibility.

Finally, with courage in your heart you take a stand, you take a deep breath, and you begin to design the life you want to live, as best as you can.


****NOTE: Again, please let me disclose I am not takingin credit for this; I did not write this (oh, how I wish I had, it says everything I had been trying to put down on paper for quite some time...whomever the author is, "I thank you")

1 comment:

Natalie Michele said...

All I gotta say is... WOW! That is so dead on for you! It was so beautifully written. I wish the author was known...

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I'm a writer that writes from the heart...and emotion (ergo, the name of my blog). Most of what I write about, I have had first hand experience in. Anything I review does not say I am an expert...I only write what I THINK and whether I like it or not! Not how the rest of the world should think or feel. I am Mexican/Italian and a Leo..again..why my blog is called the World of Emotion!! Hope you enjoy what I have to say and/or review. Enjoy!